Recent weeks have been quite exciting for me. Ima and my nieces coming over to Delhi to stay with me. Ima is not very fond of Delhi heat but chose the peak of the hot season as my nieces have their long break around this time. I, on other hand, have no complaints as was looking forward to some nice fresh vegetables, break from kitchen, all fun with my cutie nieces, etc. Wow, life is good!! Obviously, I took a long leave from office. Life, definitely, has been quite kind to me
I excitedly went to pick up Ima and my nieces. I hugged and welcomed my nieces with in our usual style at the airport. As all Manipuri parents, Ima is very shy of expressing her love for her children and as expected, she looked a bit embarrassed of the way my nieces and I were greeting one another.
We chatted along the hour and half drive back to my rented but cozy place. I have already arranged beautifully the house for them as I know they would be dead tired travelling. My nieces updating me of their travel experience. I was quite impressed as they are carrying forward on MY legacy- throwing out while travelling. I simply love them especially when I got to see my traits in them, selfish me
We were quite occupied for the next few days with longish chats at nights. I updated myself with all the news happening in our leikai and also what’s up kinds with own celebs- Bala, Soma, Pusparani, Sadananda and the likes. Proved icing on the cake when my siblings and cousins staying in and around the city joined us for few days. We had a great get-together type with me still running around for their errands and making tea, non-stop. Maximum jokes were on me (How I wish I would be the eldest in the family!!!)
With all the joy and fun, I realised something which I guessed I had not so far. I always thought am quite adjusting, have no issues when shared a room, etc as am quite comfortable and do compromise if I happen to have a roommate which eventually I did when I was in the hostel. Never have had any issues and problems with anyone. I find it quite strange and depressing that it’s drifting a bit away from me. I need to keep it with me.
I realised I have reached a zero-tolerance rate. How? Ima took to cooking. No point arguing with her to leave the kitchen. So after every meal when I do the dishes, I re-arranged the kitchen, cleaning the gas, keeping back the jars where they were to be, arranging the plates, etc. The arrangement in the fridge also changed with change in hands of the kitchen, soaps and shampoos found in the lower rows of the rack than the usual place in the upper rows. Likewise, many changes I get to find in the later days. With every change, I found myself getting irritated. I tried explaining to them what’s the rule kinds at my place to which no one paid attention I seriously need to be born the eldest!!!
I strongly feel this development seems to surface with the fact that I have been staying alone for sometime in the flat where I have been putting up for the last two and half years. Many people have said it’s too big for one person. I have my music systems, my books, television, my plants, etc to wind off my loneliness so i was quite self sufficient in my own ways, never had a dull and lonely days. But you know what? These are things I kinda control. They are programmed with me as the boss, controlling them, their growth, etc dancing according to the tune I put them up or want. In short I was leading, to put in a crude way, a self- centred life. Was I happy or not? I feel I assumed myself to be happy!!!
As being maximally optimist as I am, I think this was the way to make me realise where am heading off to and to take guard of it. I immediately understood and shared the same with Ima. She explained such things are necessary in life. I need to be tolerant at times. “Ibemma, nang luhong laga mee gee mayumda nang khakta gee niyom yarak oi. Emung dugu chatnabi, hanna leiramba neeyom pak thugaiba yaroi....” She narrated me her own stories, how she became a part of our family, etc. I was about to raise objection to some points but thought it will be wiser not to argue with her and just listen to her (for a change!!!)
I won’t want myself to place in such alarming and war time situations on the first day in my husband’s house just because they don’t keep the table where I would want it to be!!! Goosepimple, thinking of going and settling at a new place with all the expected roles!!! A house will be made a home with all US included, with no individualisation. This is one such instance in life where being tolerant is necessary, to make a house a home. Tolerance is applicable in every sphere of life. Many misunderstanding being tolerant is for so-so types, for un-ambitious people, not aggressive, etc. Life definitely is not so beautiful but quite adventurous which makes it beautiful!!!l