Discussion in 'Blogs' started by midnight crusader, May 24, 2012.

  1. midnight crusader

    midnight crusader Moderator Staff Member

    Recent weeks have been quite exciting for me. Ima and my nieces coming over to Delhi to stay with me. Ima is not very fond of Delhi heat but chose the peak of the hot season as my nieces have their long break around this time. I, on other hand, have no complaints as was looking forward to some nice fresh vegetables, break from kitchen, all fun with my cutie nieces, etc. Wow, life is good!! Obviously, I took a long leave from office. Life, definitely, has been quite kind to me :)
    I excitedly went to pick up Ima and my nieces. I hugged and welcomed my nieces with in our usual style at the airport. As all Manipuri parents, Ima is very shy of expressing her love for her children and as expected, she looked a bit embarrassed of the way my nieces and I were greeting one another.
    We chatted along the hour and half drive back to my rented but cozy place. I have already arranged beautifully the house for them as I know they would be dead tired travelling. My nieces updating me of their travel experience. I was quite impressed as they are carrying forward on MY legacy- throwing out while travelling. I simply love them especially when I got to see my traits in them, selfish me;)
    We were quite occupied for the next few days with longish chats at nights. I updated myself with all the news happening in our leikai and also what’s up kinds with own celebs- Bala, Soma, Pusparani, Sadananda and the likes. Proved icing on the cake when my siblings and cousins staying in and around the city joined us for few days. We had a great get-together type with me still running around for their errands and making tea, non-stop. Maximum jokes were on me :(:) (How I wish I would be the eldest in the family!!!)
    With all the joy and fun, I realised something which I guessed I had not so far. I always thought am quite adjusting, have no issues when shared a room, etc as am quite comfortable and do compromise if I happen to have a roommate which eventually I did when I was in the hostel. Never have had any issues and problems with anyone. I find it quite strange and depressing that it’s drifting a bit away from me. I need to keep it with me.
    I realised I have reached a zero-tolerance rate. How? Ima took to cooking. No point arguing with her to leave the kitchen. So after every meal when I do the dishes, I re-arranged the kitchen, cleaning the gas, keeping back the jars where they were to be, arranging the plates, etc. The arrangement in the fridge also changed with change in hands of the kitchen, soaps and shampoos found in the lower rows of the rack than the usual place in the upper rows. Likewise, many changes I get to find in the later days. With every change, I found myself getting irritated. I tried explaining to them what’s the rule kinds at my place to which no one paid attention :( I seriously need to be born the eldest!!!
    I strongly feel this development seems to surface with the fact that I have been staying alone for sometime in the flat where I have been putting up for the last two and half years. Many people have said it’s too big for one person. I have my music systems, my books, television, my plants, etc to wind off my loneliness so i was quite self sufficient in my own ways, never had a dull and lonely days. But you know what? These are things I kinda control. They are programmed with me as the boss, controlling them, their growth, etc dancing according to the tune I put them up or want. In short I was leading, to put in a crude way, a self- centred life. Was I happy or not? I feel I assumed myself to be happy!!!
    As being maximally optimist as I am, I think this was the way to make me realise where am heading off to and to take guard of it. I immediately understood and shared the same with Ima. She explained such things are necessary in life. I need to be tolerant at times. “Ibemma, nang luhong laga mee gee mayumda nang khakta gee niyom yarak oi. Emung dugu chatnabi, hanna leiramba neeyom pak thugaiba yaroi....” She narrated me her own stories, how she became a part of our family, etc. I was about to raise objection to some points but thought it will be wiser not to argue with her and just listen to her (for a change!!!)
    I won’t want myself to place in such alarming and war time situations on the first day in my husband’s house just because they don’t keep the table where I would want it to be!!! Goosepimple, thinking of going and settling at a new place with all the expected roles!!! A house will be made a home with all US included, with no individualisation. This is one such instance in life where being tolerant is necessary, to make a house a home. Tolerance is applicable in every sphere of life. Many misunderstanding being tolerant is for so-so types, for un-ambitious people, not aggressive, etc. Life definitely is not so beautiful but quite adventurous which makes it beautiful!!!l :)
    bebesana, sathirei, Commoner and 4 others like this.


Discussion in 'Blogs' started by midnight crusader, May 24, 2012.

    1. Oja Luwang
      Oja Luwang
      MC pura dasha nihe sidi:D
    2. midnight crusader
    3. Asemcha
      @ MC nice read!
      Sorry to say this but I hope your to-be-husband to understand you completely otherwise God help you! And Once Again as Gardener said "Dasaniha"!
      But I feel, what you feel is only natural for a Gal/Lady. Fairer Sex wants tangible things to be kept more organised.
    4. midnight crusader
    5. Langmeiton
      midnight crusader, i'm so glad that i don't suffer from obsessive compulsive disorder, & that girls do like to keep things in order..
      hehehe;).. and don't worry about the future.. we're more tolerant & will adjust with time again.. don't fret.. just enjoy every moment.. Have a chilled beer... Cheers!!
      midnight crusader likes this.
    6. midnight crusader
      midnight crusader
      Langmeiton... thanks.. brewing tea... just perfeccccttt to chill such worries away :thumbsup:
    7. Pooja Elangbam
      Pooja Elangbam
      i just attended my aunt's wedding now that i am in manipur for my holidays. i actually wore phi and mayek naiba for the first time. felt pretty nice. but also i know its ages before i marry(i.e. if i ever do) but marriage sounds exciting and freaky at the same time. i don't know what outweighs more. wait...i know...the freaky part!! also i think it must be pretty nightmarish to wake up to a new house with complete strangers one fine day and pretend like they are family now!
      Soul Rebel and Druid like this.
    8. midnight crusader
      midnight crusader
      Pooja Elangbam... rightly said so!!! I would personally like so to acquaint myself with my would-be family for the next 30-40 years??? (good choice would be to remain with my maiden family welcoming new people rather in the family :))
    9. Asemcha
      Shall we start a matriachial society here like the khasis, garos and Jhaintias?;)
    10. midnight crusader
      midnight crusader
      Ohhh my apology... miscommuincation.... read remaining single forever :D
      Druid likes this.
    11. Rosun
      MC, thank-you for bringing this up. While I was reading thru the essay, I felt like you are speaking for many of us. We stay alone in big cities. We sort of tend to become a self-sustained unit in ourselves. I know how irksome it could get to welcome guests at your place. Yes, we do like certain things to be done our way. Like for me rice is not a compulsion, I don't mind roti or noodles, why even bread at times. In fact, I prefer the change. And meals need not be elaborately arranged every time. This works for me because I work not less than 10 hours a day. Where's the time? So I totally get it what your words signify. We become these fiercely independent people- to the point of being self-centered. We are not OK sharing our space with others. If I may say so, you will have the same problem with your friends, even your boyfriend/husband. But here's a catch! As I was going thru your article, I realised that this is all right! You know why? EVERY HOME HAS IT'S RULES! Didn't we have like rules at home? That came from our fathers- gettting up early, Sumang wai shitpa, study on time, sleep on time etc. Then the mother rules the kitchen- eat properly, cook only after bathing, no meat etc. And then the grandparents- lai dhuk thanba etc. Didn't they get upset when you violate those "rules"? (Yes, those were imposed on us, empirically speaking) Now, your home in Delhi has always been yours. You dictate your terms in it. So, don't be so hard on yourself the next time you start to expect your "guests" to keep the shampoo in the "correct" row!
      midnight crusader, ubub and Druid like this.
    12. Oja Luwang
      Oja Luwang
      Oh Rosun is back... thank God...Wisdom shall be restored in MT again :)
      Druid likes this.
    13. Rosun
      Thank-you and yet I do NOT appreciate the sarcasm:p
      midnight crusader likes this.
    14. Asemcha
      He had been pretty busy with his "new" life in new place! I wanted to ask him to come to MT but I thot, may be he will eventually connect when needed. ;)
    15. Loy
      midnight crusader You are not alone. This is with every individual in the planet if I am not wrong. Every person someday in their lifetime wants to own a house, own a car, own everything. And whatever you have bought with your own money have a special place in your heart. May be you've sacrificed too much to own those things. That's why you want to keep all those stuffs in your own way. It is natural that you won't like if someone do something with your stuffs without your consent. For instance, this friend of mine never allow anyone to smoke in his car. It is his car so he sets the rule. There's nothing wrong in it. My mom do the same thing with her kitchen. My dad do the same thing with his house. I will do the same thing with my car, with my house. Every one does.

      That's all for now. No power! Battery over! :(
      midnight crusader likes this.
    16. midnight crusader
      midnight crusader
      Rosun & ubub... nice to see comments from both of you... kinda missing you for sometime on MT... you guys had some sorta telepathy to be back on MT around the same time?? :)... kidding... really nice to see some of my favourite people here on MT once again :thumbsup:
      Yeah, true... i feel it's fortunate for me to feel such a feel as to understand why Ima or Che or my friends behave the way they with their possessions!!!
    17. midnight crusader
      midnight crusader
    18. Loy
    19. Cast Away
      Cast Away
      midnight crusader I like this part
      "Life definitely is not so beautiful but quite adventurous which makes it beautiful!!!l :)" This is what I admire of you, I searched and searched and it came out in the last line. Thanks :)
      Rosun likes this.

Share This Page